Daily Archives: June 19, 2015

A VISIT TO A PUBLIC TOILET

The other day I needed to pay a visit to the public toilet, so I found a public toilet that had two cubicles.

One of the doors was locked. So I went into the other one, closed the door, dropped my trousers and sat down.

A voice came from the cubicle next to me: ‘Hello mate, how are you doing?’

Although I thought that it was a bit strange, I didn’t want to be rude, so I replied, ‘Not too bad thanks.’

After a short pause, I heard the voice again ‘So, what are you up to?’

Again I answered, somewhat reluctantly, ‘Just having a quick shit… How about yourself?’

The next thing I heard him say was ‘Sorry mate, I’ll have to call you back. I’ve got some cunt in the cubicle next to me answering everything I say.’

IS THAT A GUN?

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Bit of both, this is a rape.

A BLACK MAN

A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says “Show me whether it’s true what they say about black men”. So he stabs her & steals her purse.

MY GIRLFRIEND AND I

My girlfriend and I were having sex the other day when she looked at me and said, “Make love to me like in the movies.”
So I fucked her in the ass, pulled out, and came all over her face and hair.
I guess we don’t watch the same movies.

HOW MANY HOUSEWIVES

Question  :
How many house wives does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer :
None! What the fuck are they doing out of the kitchen!?

24 HOURS

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not.

WHEN I DIE

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep – not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE IN ?

Everyone needs believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.

%d bloggers like this: