Daily Archives: October 18, 2015
My wife accused me of being unromantic the other day.
I said, “Do you remember when I proposed to you? You said it was the happiest day of your life!”
“That’s because you asked me the day I won the lottery,” she replied.
Looking around in disappointment, my girlfriend said:
“When you told me I’d never forget tonight, I was expecting a big ring.”
“All in good time love,” I said, reaching for the lube. “All in good time.”
“Do you like having sex with me when I wear something sexy or when I’m totally naked?” asked my wife.
“No,” I replied.
A man put his charity bucket in my face.
He said, “Do you wish to change the lives of those that are starving?”
I stopped and said, “Do you?”
“Do I ?” I replied. “Of course I do.”
I said, “Get the fuck out my way, then, I want to buy my lunch.”