I was unbelievably excited when I took delivery of our 62-inch 3D Smart TV and, as I hugged and drooled over it on its stand, the wife let out a derisory huff.
“Look at the state of you! You’re pathetic!” she snarled. “Fawning over a TV – why can’t you manage that sort of affection for me?”
“Because I can get my fucking arms around the telly.”