Monthly Archives: November 2018

WHAT MY GIRLFRIEND HATES

My girlfriend hates it when I show public displays of affection at the mall.

It gets worse when I’m fingering the mannequins.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOUR LIFE IS FUCKED UP

A sure sign that your life is fucked up is when you see yourself naked in a mirror and decide you are going to have to lose some weight for your prostitute.

HE USED ME FOR SEX

“He used me for sex”

No, you used sex to get something else out of him and it didn’t work.

PHARMACY JOB

PRETEND to be a skilled pharmacist by taking half an hour to put some tablets in a fucking bag.

%d bloggers like this: